Monday, November 12, 2007
Sleeping Handsome
I've been cast as Morgan, the evil princess witch in "Sleeping Handsome" at Nicu's Spoon Theater on 38th Street. The show is really fun, the script is very funny, and the cast is great. I hope to see you all December 27-January 5! I will put the details on my acting website soon.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Blue Cliff Monastery
I spent the last five days doing sitting and walking meditation, listening to dharma talks with Thich Nhat Hanh and learning from the monks and nuns of Blue Cliff, Deer Park and Plum Village Monasteries.
This experience was so powerful. I resisted it for the first 24 hours or so - too much to do at home, didn't like the cold weather in my tent and so much outdoor time (sitting meditation, dharma talks, meals - all outside in very chilly climes). At my first "dharma sharing group" I debated in my mind whether to share that I was actually not having a very good time. Most of the people in my group were feeling blissful, peaceful, grateful to be there, and I felt like a nasty grump for wishing things were different. I thought to myself, why bother telling these people how I feel? They won't understand and they will just think that I am a complainer; someone who only focusses on the negative. But I figured, I can say it for myself, and for anyone who might be too shy to say what they really think. And through my honesty, I learned something. I began to feel hopeful that I had the potential to make a true change in myself.
In "touching the earth" I learned from Sister Chun Khong about the qualities we inherit from our ancestors, and how we must acknowledge both the positive and the negative. I realized that I have never dealt with my relationship with my father since the day he died - I pretty much locked it away and assumed that since he was dead, my relationship with him was over. But I learned that Papa is not really dead. He is manifesting himself differently now. So I must explore the spectrum of him. I can thank him for the wonderful gifts he has given me and pour the negatives into the earth to purify myself.
Imagining that Hannah is not dead, but is now a different manifestation of herself is a challenging but somewhat liberating notion. I may discover new things about Hannah even though I can no longer speak to her and sit with her the way I used to. I am thinking a lot about the elements that came together to produce Hannah and where those elements are now that she has changed manifestations. This doesn't mean I am not devastated to have lost her physical manifestation, nor that I am not questioning why it had to happen. But I am open to a new phase in my life, that I have not chosen but is nevertheless my reality.
This experience was so powerful. I resisted it for the first 24 hours or so - too much to do at home, didn't like the cold weather in my tent and so much outdoor time (sitting meditation, dharma talks, meals - all outside in very chilly climes). At my first "dharma sharing group" I debated in my mind whether to share that I was actually not having a very good time. Most of the people in my group were feeling blissful, peaceful, grateful to be there, and I felt like a nasty grump for wishing things were different. I thought to myself, why bother telling these people how I feel? They won't understand and they will just think that I am a complainer; someone who only focusses on the negative. But I figured, I can say it for myself, and for anyone who might be too shy to say what they really think. And through my honesty, I learned something. I began to feel hopeful that I had the potential to make a true change in myself.
In "touching the earth" I learned from Sister Chun Khong about the qualities we inherit from our ancestors, and how we must acknowledge both the positive and the negative. I realized that I have never dealt with my relationship with my father since the day he died - I pretty much locked it away and assumed that since he was dead, my relationship with him was over. But I learned that Papa is not really dead. He is manifesting himself differently now. So I must explore the spectrum of him. I can thank him for the wonderful gifts he has given me and pour the negatives into the earth to purify myself.
Imagining that Hannah is not dead, but is now a different manifestation of herself is a challenging but somewhat liberating notion. I may discover new things about Hannah even though I can no longer speak to her and sit with her the way I used to. I am thinking a lot about the elements that came together to produce Hannah and where those elements are now that she has changed manifestations. This doesn't mean I am not devastated to have lost her physical manifestation, nor that I am not questioning why it had to happen. But I am open to a new phase in my life, that I have not chosen but is nevertheless my reality.
Sunday, October 7, 2007
Show's over, folks
Thank you to all the people who came to see my show. You're out of the closet now!
Joe, Ryan, Amy, Alexandra and Ira, Amelie, Hilla and Asaf. You guys are awesome!
Hope to see you offstage soon.
Joe, Ryan, Amy, Alexandra and Ira, Amelie, Hilla and Asaf. You guys are awesome!
Hope to see you offstage soon.
Thursday, October 4, 2007
Only One More Performance!
The show opened last night and I had a few friends in the audience. It went really well. Come see it Friday or Saturday at 9pm!
Manhattan Repertory Theatre
303 West 42nd St 3rd Floor
Reservations (646) 329-6588
$20
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Sunday, September 23, 2007
The Electra Complex
I'm shooting a film! It's called "The Electra Complex" and I play Martha Freud, a modern reimagining of the famous analyst's wife. I'm super excited!
Sunday, September 16, 2007
The Emmys
The Quick and Dirty:
Elizabeth Perkins should have won.
I would love to see the backstage fight between Ryan and Paula after his weed gaffe!
Patricia Heaton is gorgeous, and she's one of my idols.
Katherine Heigl IS funny! And her mom is adorable.
The Late Night with Conan O'Brien people are so clever and so in the moment.
It's lame that they censored Sally Field's war comment, but of course it's Fox.
The Sopranos are right: this country is run by gangsters.
Elizabeth Perkins should have won.
I would love to see the backstage fight between Ryan and Paula after his weed gaffe!
Patricia Heaton is gorgeous, and she's one of my idols.
Katherine Heigl IS funny! And her mom is adorable.
The Late Night with Conan O'Brien people are so clever and so in the moment.
It's lame that they censored Sally Field's war comment, but of course it's Fox.
The Sopranos are right: this country is run by gangsters.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Six Years Today
Perhaps September 11, 2001 is like our generation's JFK assassination. "Where were you when the towers were hi,?" New Yorkers sometimes ask each other. Of course I remember exactly where I was when I heard, exactly what I thought, exactly what I did afterwards. Now it has been six years.
As I watched a couple hours of the name reading today, my heart went out to the thousands of families of the victims. Some of them seemed as pained as ever. Of course, I know what it is like to lose someone to a senseless tragedy. On a day like today, Hannah is such a part of my thoughts that I almost don't feel alone. Her death, her absence are weights I wear as I wade through the day. Gray skies reinforce the sobriety of the day.
As I'm sure the September 11th families feel of their lost ones, every new experience is a question for me - what would Hannah have thought about this? What would she have said? When I see a movie, I wish I could call her up to discuss it. When I'm excited, my first thought is still to call her to share. When I have a few extra minutes on the upper west side, my reflex is still to ask her if she wants to meet me at the Starbucks on 93rd Street. I don't cry every day anymore, but on some level I think I will never completely accept or understand that Hannah is gone. It doesn't seem possible, it doesn't seem right and it doesn't seem to serve any purpose.
As I watched a couple hours of the name reading today, my heart went out to the thousands of families of the victims. Some of them seemed as pained as ever. Of course, I know what it is like to lose someone to a senseless tragedy. On a day like today, Hannah is such a part of my thoughts that I almost don't feel alone. Her death, her absence are weights I wear as I wade through the day. Gray skies reinforce the sobriety of the day.
As I'm sure the September 11th families feel of their lost ones, every new experience is a question for me - what would Hannah have thought about this? What would she have said? When I see a movie, I wish I could call her up to discuss it. When I'm excited, my first thought is still to call her to share. When I have a few extra minutes on the upper west side, my reflex is still to ask her if she wants to meet me at the Starbucks on 93rd Street. I don't cry every day anymore, but on some level I think I will never completely accept or understand that Hannah is gone. It doesn't seem possible, it doesn't seem right and it doesn't seem to serve any purpose.
Sunday, September 9, 2007
From Forgiveness to Lord of the Flies...
Last night, I went to hear Susannah Heschel speak at BJ. She is a professor at Dartmouth and the daughter of the late Abraham Joshua Heschel, a pioneer of Jewish thought. One of his famous phrases was to "pray with your feet" - meaning to march in Selma with MLK.
The talk by SH was on the topic of forgiveness, since Yom Kippur is rapidly approaching. She began by saying that she feels allergic to the word forgiveness as our society understands it - all the swallowing of anger, the false "I forgive you"s that are thrown around. I tend to agree with this - I can forgive someone if they are very sincere about making amends and committing to change for the future. Repeatedly accepting someone's apology while they continue to wrong you isn't forgiveness - it's stupidity and self-abuse.
The next point she made was about forgiveness as it is misunderstood - when it is really understanding (as in the case of an abusive parent who turned out himself to have been abused, so the child understands and "forgives" them for doing it.) I agreed that in a way it's not possible to forgive because the circumstances are complicated by extenuating circumstance. But what I think is that at a certain point in our adult lives, we have to examine the experiences we had and ask ourselves how long we will make that our excuse for the way we are now. We can spend the rest of our lives bemoaning the hand we were dealt, or we can decide to make a new start. For some, this is a change of attitude. For others, this means psychotherapy. But for all, it is taking adult responsibility.
Finally, Prof. Heschel made the case for "being a busybody," by which she meant interfering and getting involved when you think you can help people resolve their disputes. In our culture, we are often told to "mind our own beeswax." But the truth is that from the highest levels, we also value poking our nose in the business of others, and in fact we feel guilty when we wait too long to do this - clearly, we should have gotten involved in WWII earlier to save more Jewish lives, and there have been countless genocides and human rights situations that have warranted intervention since then.
So, my question is this: on what level are we comfortable with intervention? When I'm on the subway or the sidewalk, I often cringe at the way parents scream at their children, berating them for perceived flaws or missteps. Should I say something?
The other day, I was standing in line at a box office and there were two women behind me. One got out of line for a moment to read the fine print on a poster about the play. When she stepped back, the other woman wouldn't let her back to her place. She said the woman hadn't asked her to hold the place. Of course the other woman countered with "I didn't think I had to - I thought it was implied." Now, I'm not really judging one or the other, although I figure it's just one person, let her back in line, right? But that's not really the point. The point is, they got into a screaming match, complete with expletives, and I finally turned around and just said, "I can't believe you're having this conversation." Why create so much strife over such a little thing? I didn't think I could stand there and mind my own business as if this was acceptable - because sometimes when we don't have anyone to check our behavior, we get out of control. 9th graders know this from reading Lord of the Flies.
It's a fine line, knowing when to intervene, when to mind our own business. Please comment!
The talk by SH was on the topic of forgiveness, since Yom Kippur is rapidly approaching. She began by saying that she feels allergic to the word forgiveness as our society understands it - all the swallowing of anger, the false "I forgive you"s that are thrown around. I tend to agree with this - I can forgive someone if they are very sincere about making amends and committing to change for the future. Repeatedly accepting someone's apology while they continue to wrong you isn't forgiveness - it's stupidity and self-abuse.
The next point she made was about forgiveness as it is misunderstood - when it is really understanding (as in the case of an abusive parent who turned out himself to have been abused, so the child understands and "forgives" them for doing it.) I agreed that in a way it's not possible to forgive because the circumstances are complicated by extenuating circumstance. But what I think is that at a certain point in our adult lives, we have to examine the experiences we had and ask ourselves how long we will make that our excuse for the way we are now. We can spend the rest of our lives bemoaning the hand we were dealt, or we can decide to make a new start. For some, this is a change of attitude. For others, this means psychotherapy. But for all, it is taking adult responsibility.
Finally, Prof. Heschel made the case for "being a busybody," by which she meant interfering and getting involved when you think you can help people resolve their disputes. In our culture, we are often told to "mind our own beeswax." But the truth is that from the highest levels, we also value poking our nose in the business of others, and in fact we feel guilty when we wait too long to do this - clearly, we should have gotten involved in WWII earlier to save more Jewish lives, and there have been countless genocides and human rights situations that have warranted intervention since then.
So, my question is this: on what level are we comfortable with intervention? When I'm on the subway or the sidewalk, I often cringe at the way parents scream at their children, berating them for perceived flaws or missteps. Should I say something?
The other day, I was standing in line at a box office and there were two women behind me. One got out of line for a moment to read the fine print on a poster about the play. When she stepped back, the other woman wouldn't let her back to her place. She said the woman hadn't asked her to hold the place. Of course the other woman countered with "I didn't think I had to - I thought it was implied." Now, I'm not really judging one or the other, although I figure it's just one person, let her back in line, right? But that's not really the point. The point is, they got into a screaming match, complete with expletives, and I finally turned around and just said, "I can't believe you're having this conversation." Why create so much strife over such a little thing? I didn't think I could stand there and mind my own business as if this was acceptable - because sometimes when we don't have anyone to check our behavior, we get out of control. 9th graders know this from reading Lord of the Flies.
It's a fine line, knowing when to intervene, when to mind our own business. Please comment!
Friday, August 31, 2007
And finally...The American Idol Auditions!
Many people have asked me - did I get to sing for Simon, Randy and Paula? Nope. Since there are thousands of people, what they do is they have 16 tables set up on the arena floor. Each table has a judge, and you approach the table in groups of four. You sing one at a time, and then the judge tells which people are going on to the next round. If they're moving you forward, you get a Golden Ticket, and you get to go on to the next round.
It was about half star talent (people who have a shot at winning the overall contest) and half wacky people. These people were dressed in all kinds of costumes: a 300-pound lady in all white trimmed with feathers, a trio of girl scouts a la Andrews Sisters, a little guy in a purple leotard, a man in a frizzy red wig, Batgirl and Catwoman - all these people made it to the next round. Look for them when the series premieres!
Rebecca is in a new play!
I'm playing the role of Grace in "Ashtrays for Vodka" as part of the Fall Festival at the Manhattan Repertory Theater. October 3, 5 and 6 at 9pm. Come see me!
Thursday, August 30, 2007
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
I'm Delinquent!
Okay, apparently I am not pumping these American Idol posts out fast enough. (Thank you, RM.) So I'll throw out a bone here until I have a chunk of time to write more.
For the first four hours in the arena, we were sitting in our assigned seats filming "crowd shots." If you've ever seen the show, you know that is where everyone is screaming and waving their arms. If you've ever worked in television or film, you know that NOTHING is spontaneous, and that "impromptu" take was actually take number 9 (or 47.) Sooooo....that took a while.
Then, finally, they started setting up the tables for the actual auditions.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Me on Audition Day
I wore my favorite audition shirt (everyone's seen it on my Facebook page, right?) a black skirt and the hottest heels.
That did not impress my judge, a casual woman.
(The guy before me fell on the floor when his song was over. She gave him a golden ticket, and as if to exonerate herself, said "He made me laugh, so I gave it to him." I thought about changing my song at that point but figured it wouldn't work twice in a row anyway.)
Special Guest Ryan Seacrest
Girls were screaming wildly for him - here he is being followed by cameras on the floor.
My First Glance at the Arena
FULL OF PEOPLE!
Every single one of these people wants to be the next American Idol.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
